I sulk knowing now she will be so absorbed in the glory of the new found love, that she will have to charge her mobile battery 3 times a day, that she will hang up our call gushing like a teenager saying "he's calling..". I long to tell her that this feeling will pass like everything else, it for all I wish is not temporary and it against all odds will work out for her. I've listed out at least a few lines giving excuses of my reasons to sulk but not actually hitting the nail in the head, so here we go. I sulk and there is an element of sadness in this joy I share for her because she left me alone! Alone! in this jungle, the Land of Single hood not that I'm scared, I've been leading the pack haven't I?
Growing up, I mean really growing up from College, to a steady job in a cosmopolitan city, to travelling to London to making a life here I have never once looked back and wished to stay back in a place I was. I admit like everyone else I would have wished to go back and set things right, but I wouldn't go back and be there because I have had some real tough times. I have loved and lost and at times lost before I even realised I loved! don't ask! its a post in itself :) At every stage in life high school, college and work I have always had this few friends who shared or rather understood my beliefs, my so called rules and my outlook to life. I wont say I'm unique and different from everyone else but very few agreed or saw things the way I did, again its my beliefs so some understood, some disagreed but some preached! Now when someone talks about their own ideologies they don't need your approval or your advise but some people never learnt and would preach about what I was seeing wrong and why my outlook to everything had a dark tinge to it.
Coming back to the whole point of LoVe and how the perception changes as you climb the stairway to the old home maybe :), I had few simple rules, never to marry a guy whom u have never met with the intention of trying him out. In simple words the concept of "Arranged" marriage is just plain BS to me! Again not offending anyone here who might have gone for it, my parents had and they have a very good marriage. Also never to marry before I hit the 26 mark. Looking at the future from when I was 21 fresh out of college and working in one of the most respected IT firms the night was still young! I was living life to the fullest surrounded by people I like and at times breaking a few hearts and getting my heart broken a couple of times. How did things change from that to this? Where these 3 girls who "get" me, started panicking about being single and went out on a hunt. Seriously!! they would meet any new guy with a watchful eye like comparing the person against a mental check list they had. Good looking "check", Good sense of Humour "check".I mean come on, why is that suddenly the moment you cross 24 you look at yourself as if you are like a wilting flower/plant or something, better get them before your face falls off or your brain stops working!
I don't see any reason behind peoples rush to work things out, if you want to find love and get married, don't go shopping for love with a list in your head. And among those 3 girls two of them went through this kind of panic attack and settled for either a guy their parents chose or some guy who chose them where in the girl never loved him but grew to love him! This left out the 2 of us me and for sake of easiness let call her VN. VN and I used to talk a lot to each other couple of hours over weekends and a few minutes everyday. I missed my life in India and London left me with few new friends not people who had me as a friend because they liked me rather people who didn't have a choice to pick friends so stuck with me. VN and I were the only ones sticking to our ideas of committing a little later in life and enjoying the single life and the usual stuff you say you do when u don't have a bf/gf/fiance/spouse to make out or fight with :) I relied on her the days I felt my parents actually despise me because they were encouraging me to register on some matrimonial sites just in case its too late by the time I am 26 or 27 that I get only... *gasp* the left overs!! arghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh! don't get me started but such days of mental torture was coped by calling VN up ranting out to her about anything and everything some name calling and signing off with a good laugh.
Now VN the mature, independent single girl who "gets" me and sharing the same outlook to life is *tadaaa drum roll* is in lurrrvvvv and getting married! yeah! yohooooooooo my friend is getting married, Wait wait! did I tell you to whom?? No? well to the same guy I mentioned in the beginning of this post! Wait the best part... she tells me "Its so nice to see dad and ma so happy, and he is soo cute!" after all that she went through I think she deserved the beshhht! :)
Here's to you babe... and u guys make a cute couple!
